Life In Pleasantville
Food, Travel, Life
My ten year old daughter is a funny, beautiful, talented and intelligent girl. She is also utterly and completely exhausting. But not in the physical sense that my son is; he wears me out, yes, but nothing that a hot bath, a bottle of Shiraz, and a good cry can’t cure. Pre-teen girls, I am discovering, …
The darkness is long, and it lingers.The ice is hard on the bay.It’s so damn cold out it freezes my nose-hairs.Winter, go the f**k away. The ground is hard and it’s frozen.My grass is dead where it lays.Mr. Groundhog’s a corpse-icle down there.Please. Go the f**k away. Leaving bed every morning is torture.The blankets where …
I’ve had it with every holiday being about kids, or kids and presents, or decorating for kids. I’m the happy mother of two kids whom I love and I spend a good percentage of my time doing things for them or with them. I wouldn’t have it any other way. But HOLY SHIT! Can one …
DISCLAIMER: I’m only baby crazy. I am not having a baby any time soon. You can breathe easy again, Mom. In October, I did my favourite thing ever and stuck my feet in a set of stirrups in a gynaecologist’s office and then I had a little polyurethane plastic popped into my uterus (yay). I’m not sure …
Valentine’s Day is coming! You know what that means? It’s time to think about how to make a special statement to your loved one by using your wallet. This is assuming you have a loved one you have to open your wallet for. I’m kinda with you, Christina Applegate: how do you drop whatever you’re doing …
Dear Millicent, I have a family member, let’s call him Uncle Frank. Uncle Frank doesn’t know when to leave. He will stay at our place long after all our other guests have left, completely ignoring all subtle hints about the lateness of the hour like pointed yawns and comments about having to get the kids …
Dear Millicent, I am a person who feels things. I am quick to laugh, quick to empathetic tears, and more distressingly, quick to “oh my god, your stupidity is making me rage volcano spew fiery hot lava through my veins.” When issues arise because of other people not using a single ounce of logic or …
When I became a mother I knew the role would require me to fulfill certain tasks, but I never realized how it would be a full-time job keeping my children satiated. Children everywhere around me appeared to be hungry at all times and it was a given that I should prevent my kids from understanding …
