We Canadians are famous for being “too polite” (is there such a thing?) and I know full well that I am “polite” and “apologetic” to a fault. Mr Hockey Coach once threw his hands up in the air and asked me why I was so apologetic all the time. I didn’t really have an answer. I’ve apologized to people who’ve hit me with their shopping car, run into me on a sidewalk and stepped on my toe. How dare I take up space! But I’ve been apologizing – and forgiving people – for way too many things. And I’m done.
I’ve stood up for people who didn’t deserve it. I’ve lost sleep over the fear of upsetting someone who gives exactly zero fuddleduddles about how I feel. I BATTLED GUILT OVER FILING MY PETITION FOR DIVORCE, TWO AND A HALF YEARS LATER. I have justified my decisions to people who know less about my life than rocket science, and have let their judgment suck the joy out of my life, planting seeds of doubt that grow and take over my mind the way weeds take over a garden. And I just won’t do it any longer.
Without further ado, I present to you the things I will no longer apologize for, justify, or otherwise feel badly about.
- Eating a pan of nachos for dinner
- Asking for what I want
- My parenting decisions
- My dating decisions
- Actually, wait… my decisions in general
- Being single, and choosing to be single
- Standing up for myself
- Getting a divorce
- Letting my son wear nail polish, dress up in dresses, or play with dolls and/or stuffies
- Teaching my son to pee sitting down, and encouraging it (who wants to clean up poor aim?)
- Eating cookies for breakfast
- Having that second glass of wine
- Prioritizing myself and my happiness sometimes
- Being a weirdo
- Sometimes – just sometimes – being a bitch
- Focusing on my career, even though I’m a single mother
And these are just a few. What do YOU apologize for that you don’t need to (or shouldn’t)?