When I first started working out at Orangetheory Fitness in Whitby, I anticipated big changes to take place, physically. I used to be pretty fit, but I’ve been getting more and more out of shape since popping out baby number two, more than two years ago. I figured it would be a reasonably straightforward process; I’ve always gotten back into shape pretty quickly, and I have this subconscious weight cap that’ve always kind of kept myself under, as long as there isn’t a baby inside me.
It seems as though 2016 was the year to break all the rules. Perhaps it was the fact that my computer sat in front of my kitchen, making it far too easy to snack and work. Perhaps it was my unwillingness to step on the scale (a misguided act of body positivity; more on that later.) to really check in. Perhaps it was my rage eating leading up to the US election. Perhaps it was the holiday season and indulging too often. Regardless, I stepped on the scale at the beginning of January and just about fell right off. I was the heaviest I’ve ever been, with or without a little person growing inside of me.
But I’ve been working out at least twice a week since the end of October! I’ve been burning all these calories, because Orangetheory Fitness is amazing at burning calories and raising your metabolic rate for up to 36 hours after a workout, so you continue to burn more calories!
That’s when I had to give myself a little dose of reality.
How the hell could I possibly lose weight or fat, when I was indulging in a grande Chestnut Praline Latte after every workout? I was literally drinking all the calories I had just burned. And I was using those workouts as an excuse to indulge in chocolate chips or caramel popcorn or an extra glass of wine. I am living proof that all of that working out and all of that eating and drinking do not cancel each other out.
So, I got honest with myself. And I got real.
I admitted to myself that I wasn’t eating enough vegetables. That I was ordering takeout for the family too often. I admitted that having several glasses of wine most nights of the week was a coping mechanism that was making it harder for me to get up and work out, in the morning. I admitted that even though I had told myself I wasn’t going to weigh in on principle, it was actually just a great excuse to not be accountable to myself. I admitted to myself that, at 40 years old, losing weight wasn’t going to be as easy as it was at 35. And then I admitted to myself that the expectations I had placed on myself to get back to where I had been before kids had entered the equation were lofty, and not really about being healthy at all. They were about wanting to be skinny, not strong.
And that’s when the transformation began.
This time, my transformation is coming from within. I. Love. This. Workout. I don’t normally enjoy workouts. I don’t look forward to them. They have always been a means to an end, and the end was being skinnier than I currently am. Not with Orangetheory Fitness. Honestly, I look forward to this workout every time I do it. The coaches are inspiring and motivating. They know my name, and they comment on progress they see in my workouts. We joke. And the whole team very much wants to see me achieve my own version of success.
Now, I am starting to see strength, when I look in the mirror. No, I’m not skinny, but I see muscles where there was flab. I have lost some weight, and I fit back into several pairs of jeans I’d stopped wearing, before the holidays. Hell, I now actually get up at 6am one day each weekend in order to fit in a workout, despite never being a morning person in my entire life. And when I travel to Florida in a month to visit my in-laws, I’ve actually scoped out the nearest OTF to their home, so I can do a few workouts down there.
This feels like a new me. #Fit40? You’d better believe it.