My daughter is in Grade 4 this year and we’ve been very lucky; she has loved every teacher she has had so far. That is until now. Her teacher this year is stressing her out. I didn’t expect of course that she wouldn’t ever get a teacher she wouldn’t mesh with. That’s unrealistic. Doesn’t everybody have a story of “that teacher” after all? I’d be willing to let this all slide normally, but this teacher is different.
She yells. A lot. I’m aware I live in glass house here, and shouldn’t throw stones. So full disclosure, I yell. Believe me when I say, I am getting better at this but my kids still find those buttons occasionally. I can lose my cool and yell because my children drive me absolutely put-me-in-a-straitjacket-and-commit-me crazy sometimes. And it’s not just my kids. Other peoples kids have that affect on me as well. Although, I’ve never raised my voice at a child other than my own. It’s a flaw in my character and I know myself well enough that teaching never even crossed my mind. So, I have to ask, has it ever occurred to this teacher that maybe, just maybe she isn’t well suited for the job? Maybe it’s time to take a break. Talk to somebody?
Before school started Morgan was stressing about getting a certain teacher because she’d heard she was really mean. To me, that’s just rumour and I explained to her “What if this teacher heard that you were an awful student. Difficult to deal with. Mean. Whiny?” “I am not,” she protested. “No, you’re not, but let’s pretend that’s the scuttlebutt in the teacher’s lounge”. So now this teacher is at home saying, “I hope I don’t get that Morgan kid. Please don’t let me get that Morgan kid in my class”. With this she started to laugh and I like to think it showed her it’s not fair to draw conclusions until you know. She didn’t end up getting the mean teacher, but she did end up with the mean teacher that yells. Sigh.
My youngest daughter has commented that every time she walks by her older sister’s classroom the teacher is yelling. My niece and nephew confirm that yup, she’s a yeller. Other mothers are hearing from their children that she yells all the time and during the second week of school my daughter broke down crying because she “feels really bad” when her teacher yells. I know one family that is working to have their daughter removed from the class. In the most telling story of all, my nine-year old has observed that every time an adult comes in to observe the class her teacher gets very sweet.
So, I don’t think this is the typical problem of a personality clash. I think this teacher is a little out of line. Herein lies the problem. My daughter does not want me to approach the school. Obviously, she’s afraid of retribution even though she denies that. She seems to have resigned herself to having this teacher and has taken a “keep my head down” attitude towards the whole thing.
I’m getting a little tired of hearing about this though. I mean every day I hear some story about this teacher and frankly, I don’t want to hear about the teacher. I want to hear about what’s been taught. I want my daughter to learn at school, not live in fear of being yelled at. I’m ready to go talk to this teacher, despite my daughter’s protests. Am I out of line? Over-reacting?
What would you do?