Canadians know how to throw a party, and we don’t let a little thing like -21C (that’s -6F for our American friends) stop us. After all, if we restricted our celebrations to the days we felt all ten toes and our ears weren’t red, some parts of Canada would only get out for nine weeks of the year. We’ve adapted to the conditions by coming up with some creative Canadian winter festivals, and we’re happy to share them with visitors. What’s a party without guests? Let’s get the big guns out of …
Winter, Go the F**k Away (An Eastern Canadian Poem)
The darkness is long, and it lingers. The ice is hard on the bay. It's so damn cold out it freezes my nose-hairs. Winter, go the f**k away. The ground is hard and it's frozen. My grass is dead where it lays. Mr. Groundhog's a corpse-icle down there. Please. Go the f**k away. Leaving bed every morning is torture. The blankets where I wish I could stay. But the kid has to get ready for school now. And winter's not f**king going away. I'm so thankful I'm married to …
